[April Fool: Sejarah Hina Islam]

This article from SELEKSI newspaper kinda got my attention. You'll see why.

"Biasanya menjelang 1hb April, sesetengah orang kita begitu taksub dengan budaya 'pandang kebarat'. Berbalik kepada perayaan April Fool's Day ini, adalah ia mula dirayakan sewaktu kejatuhan kerajaan Islam di Sepanyol. Setelah bertapak berkurun-kurun lamanya di Granada, Sepanyol, kerajaan Islam akhirnya runtuh diserang tentera-tentera Kristian.
Penduduk-penduduk Islam di Sepanyol(Moors) terpaksa berlindungdi dalam rumah masing-masing untuk menyelamatkan diri. Tentera-tentera Kristian bagaimanapun tidak berpuas hati dan berusaha untuk menghapuskan orang-orang Islam di Sepanyol.
Penduduk-penduduk muslim ini, diberitahu bahwa mereka boleh berlayar keluar dari Sepanyol dengan selamat bersama barang-barang keperluan mereka dengan menggunakan kapal-kapal yang dimaksudkan.
Setelah berpuas hati, mereka membuat persiapan untuk bertolak. Keesokan harinya (1 April), mereka mengambil semua barangan yang telah disiapkan menuju ke perlabuhan.
Pada waktu inilah pihak Kristian mengambil kesempatan untuk mengeledah dan kemudian membakar rumah penduduk-penduduk Islam ini.
Mereka juga tidak sempat untuk menaiki kapal kerana semuanya dibakar. Pihak Kristian kemudiannya menyerang kaum muslim dan membunuh kesemuanya, lelaki, perempuan, serta anak-anak kecil. Persitiwa berdarah yang menyedihkan ini kemudiannya diraihkan oleh tentera Kristian.
Keraian ini akhirnya dirayakan setiap tahun bukan sahaja di Sepanyol tetapi juga di serata dunia.
Yang menyedihkan, orang-orang Islam yang jahil mengenai peristiwa ini turut meraikan April Fool's Day tanpa menyedari mereka sebenarnya merayakan ulang tahun pembunuhan beramai-ramai saudara seIslam mereka sendiri.
April Fool's secara amnya adalah hari dimana perbuatan memperolok-olok sesiapa sahaja menjadi teras sambutannya.Selalunya April Fool ini kebanyakkannya bermula sewaktu di sekolah dahulu, sepanjang hari terpaksa berhati-hati kerana pasti sahaja penipuan akan dilakukan dan boleh jadi dari sesiapa sahaja. Sekiranya terperangkap mempercayai penipuan tersebut maka ejekan April Fool's akan diberi kepada mangsa. Dalam erti kata lain April Fool's boleh disebut sebagai 'hari menipu'. Mungkin ada yang berkata memperolok-olok itu hanya sekadar gurauan. Tetapi apakah gurauan itu dibenarkan dalam Islam?
Terdapat pelbagai sejarah mengenai sambutan 'hari penipuan' atau April Fools' ini. Yang menarik dewasa ini terdapat banyak sebaran mengatakan ianya adalah bersempena penghapusan dan penipuan keatas umat Islam di Sepanyol suata masa dahulu dan sebagainya. Cerita ini masih diragui kesahihannya. Adalah lebih baik kita menilai terus elemen sambutan itu sendiri apakah ianya dibenarkan atau tidak.
Islam mendidik umatnya agar sentiasa mengamalkan perlakuan jujur dah menjauhi sikap suka menipu. Allah berfirman di dalam Al-Quran:
Wahai orang-orang yang beriman! Bertakwalah kamu kepada Allah dan hendaklah kamu berada bersama-sama orang-orang yang benar.[at-Taubah 9:119]
Berkata Ibnu Katsir di dalam tafsirnya tentang ayat diatas: Ia bermaksud: sentiasalah berlaku jujur dan kommited pada kejujuran agar kamu berada di golongan orang-orang (yang jujur) dan terselamat dari malapetaka. Dan ini akan mengeluarkan kamu daripada masalah.
Di dunia ini, setiap manusia yang sihat akalnya pasti akan lebih menyukai kejujuran daripada perbuatan menipu. Islam merupakan agama yang meraihkan fitrah yang baik. Wallahu'alam."

Wow, I can't believe I actually typed it all out. Hmm. Okay so all you muslim people please think before you guys start pranking anyone on the 1st of April. A proper update will be out soon. But for now I'll be posting articles after articles that interests me. Take care.

[you are not alone]

I just saw a video of Michael Jackson singing "You Are Not Alone" live on youtube and I have to say he is sexy. Hahaha! I never thought of it before. Ok maybe when I saw the music video for "The Way You Make Me Feel". Wow. So sexy. And the song is... moving. I'm too lazy to paste the video here but here's the link. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R9DDTiPzJCk&feature=related

[songs]

Obviously, I haven't been online for awhile. Mainly because I've been too tired and lazy. Been quite well lately. Haven't had too much thoughts of... ihminen. I did have a few dreams but whatever. I feel quite good. Heart is patching itself back quite nicely. Brain has been listening to commands nowadays. Overall, good progress. Haha! I set myself a target. 2 weeks. That's all I need to get over ihminen. A week has passed now. Tomorrow, or rather today, is a new week. Let's see what it'll bring.

Eh just now, suddenly got black out sia! My laptop suddenly turned off! Along with the rest of the electrical appliances la. I quickly took my handphone and used it as a torchlight because the parents don't know I'm awake and wasting electricity. It was freaky and super dark la! Luckily the storeroom isn't so far away. Like next door. Haha. So anyways, I flipped back the fuse and everything was dandy. Found out the nightlight couldn't be on-ed. Suspect the exposed switch was the culprit and switched off the power to the nightlight. Smelt of burnt plastic too. Bleah.

The new phone has been good so far. It has a system which can read out the callers name among other things. I love the fact that it can read out your sms for you. Haha! Me, being a curious kid who likes to fiddle with whatever gadgets I can find, is clearly thrilled by this. I take every oppurtunity to try it out. Its even more satisfying when you have a really long message. Of course, the guy/girl reading the message for you can't read it accurately if its not in English la. Things like "hmmm.." will be spelt out for you. Haha! Weird but cool. I have my messages read for me when I'm bored. Hmm..

Been hooked on a few songs. Some of which I'll post the lyrics to.


D'Masiv: Cinta Ini Membunuhku

Kau membuat ku berantakan
Kau membuat ku tak karuan
Kau membuat ku tak berdaya
Kau menolakku acuhkan diriku

Bagaimana caranya untuk
Meruntuhkan kerasnya hatimu
Ku sadari ku tak sempurna
Ku tak seperti yang kau inginkan

[Reff]
Kau hancurkan aku dengan sikapmu
Tak sadarkah kau telah menyakitiku
Lelah hati ini meyakinkanmu
Cinta ini membunuhku

Bagaimana caranya untuk
Meruntuhkan kerasnya hatimu
Ku sadari ku tak sempurna
Ku tak seperti yang kau inginkan

Back to Reff

Lelah hati ini meyakinkanmu
Cinta ini membunuhku

Craig David : Insomnia

I never thought that I'd fall in love, love, love, love
But it grew from a simple crush, crush, crush, crush
Being without you girl, I was all messed up, up, up, up
When you walked out, said that you'd had enough-nough-nough-nough

Been a fool, girl I know
Didn't expect this is how things would go
Maybe in time, you'll change your mind
Now looking back i wish i could rewind

Because i can't sleep til you're next to me
No i can't live without you no more
Oh i stay up til you're next to me
Til this house feels like it did before
Feels like insomnia ah ah, Feels like insomnia ah ah
Feels like insomnia ah ah, Feels like insomnia ah ah

Remember telling my boys that I'd never fall in love, love, love, love
You used to think I'd never find a girl I could trust, trust, trust, trust
And then you walked into my life and it was all about us, us, us, us
But now I'm sitting here thinking I messed the whole thing up, up, up, up

Been a fool (fool), girl I know (know)
Didn't expect this is how things would go
Maybe in time (time), you'll change your mind (mind)
Now looking back i wish i could rewind

Because i can't sleep til you're next to me
No i can't live without you no more (without you no more)
Oh i stay up til you're next to me (to me)
Til this house feels like it did before (Because it)
Feels like insomnia ah ah, Feels like insomnia ah ah
Feels like insomnia ah ah (Ah), Feels like insomnia ah ah

Ah, i just can't go to sleep
Cause it feels like I've fallen for you
It's getting way too deep
And i know that it's love because

I can't sleep til you're next to me
No i can't live without you no more (without you no more)
Oh i stay up til you're next to me (to me)
Til this house feels like it did before
Feels like insomnia ah ah, Feels like insomnia ah ah
Feels like insomnia ah ah, Feels like insomnia ah ah

Feels like insomnia ah ah, Feels like insomnia ah ah
Feels like insomnia ah ah, Feels like insomnia ah ah

Natalie Cole: Miss You Like Crazy

Even though its been so long, my love for you keeps going strong
I remember the things that we used to do, a kiss in the rain
Til' the sun shined through, I'd try to deny it, but I'm still in love with you
I miss you like crazy, I miss you like crazy, ever since you went away
Every hour of every day, I miss you like crazy, I miss you like crazy
No matter what I say or do, there's just no getting over you
I can see the love shining in your eyes, and it comes as such a sweet surprise
If seeing's believing its worth the wait, so hold me and tell me its not too late
We're so good together, we're starting forever now, And I miss you like crazy
I miss you like crazy, ever since you went away, every hour of every day
I miss you like crazy, I miss you baby, a love like ours will never end
Just touch me and we're there again
Musical interlude
Just one night and we'll have that magic feeling like we used to do
Hold on tight and whatever comes our way we're gonna make it through
If seeing's believing its worth the wait, so hold me and tell me its not too late
We're so good together, we're starting forever now
And I miss you like crazy, I miss you like crazy
No matter what I say or do there's just no getting over you
And I miss you (baby), I miss you (baby), all the tender love you gave me
When a feeling gets this strong, you know the real thing come along
And I miss you, I miss you like crazy baby, only (you're) should be "your" sweet love
Can save me, I miss you like crazy, a love like ours will never end
Just touch me and we're there again,
Miss you like crazy, I miss you like crazy

Pink: Please Don't Leave Me

Da da da da, da da da da
Da da da da-da da

I don't know if I can yell any louder
How many time have I kicked you outta here?
Or said something insulting?
da da da da-da
I can be so mean when I wanna be
I am capable of really anything
I can cut you into pieces
But my heart is....broken

Da da da-da da
Please don't leave me
Please don't leave me
I always say how I don't need you
But it's always gonna come right back to this
Please, don't leave me

How did I become so obnoxious?
What is it with you that makes me act like this?
I've never been this nasty
Can't you tell that this is all just a contest?
The one that wins will be the one that hits the hardest
But baby I don't mean it
I mean it, I promise

Da da da-da da
Please don't leave me
Da da da-da da
Please don't leave me
Da da da-da da
I always say how I don't need you
But it's always gonna come right back to this
Please, don't leave me

I forgot to say out loud how beautiful you really are to me
I can't be without, you're my perfect little punching bag
And I need you, I'm sorry.

Da da da da, da da da da
da da da da-da da
Please, please don't leave me

Baby please don't leave me
No, don't leave me
Please don't leave me no no no
You say I don't need you but it's always gonna come right back,
It's gonna come right back to this.
Please, don't leave me.
No.
No, don't leave me
Please don't leave me, oh no no no.
I always say how I don't need you
But it's always gonna come right back to this

Please don't leave me
Please don't leave me


Ekamatra: Sentuhan Kecundang

Kita..tempuh
Segala rintangan
Kecundang jua menimpa

Kita..telah
Mencuba segala
Namun tewas akhirnya

Putus tak bisa disambung
Kusut tak terhurai
Hilang tak bisa diganti
Patah kekeringan

Cinta terlarang
Bagai terbuang
Dalam rimba yang gelap dan penuh duri..

Mestikah aku meratap
Membinasakan diriku
Ataupun biar saja
Ia berlalu

Sentuhan kali terakhir
Abadi dalam hatiku
Tak dapatku menghalang
Perpisahan ini..

Anne Murray: You Needed Me
I cried a tear
You wiped it dry
I was confused
You cleared my mind
I sold my soul
You bought it back for me
And held me up and gave me dignity
Somehow you needed me.

Chorus
You gave me strength

To stand alone again
To face the world
Out on my own again
You put me high upon a pedestal
So high that I could almost see eternity
You needed me
You needed me

And I can't believe it's you I can't believe it's true
I needed you and you were there
And I'll never leave, why should I leave
I'd be a fool
'Cause I've finally found someone who really cares

You held my hand
When it was cold
When I was lost
You took me home
You gave me hope
When I was at the end
And turned my lies
Back into truth again
You even called me friend

Repeat Chorus

You needed me
You needed me

[doing well]

I wrote this for my prettiestfavourite friend
But while trying not to prove that I care
Trying not to make all my moves in one motion and scare her away
Well she can't see she's making me crazy now
I don't believe she knows she's amazing how
She has me holding my breath
So I'd never guess that I'm a none such unsuitable, unsuited for her


oh my god, I totally kopped this from Fit's blog.. again! hahaha! Thanks Fit. You always have such great things to say. And not to mention nice song collection. That Jai Ho song is abit weird though. And Run is originally by Snow Patrol! Hmm. Now I have a new list of songs to download. Awesome!

oh well.. Woke up this morning with the feeling "i miss you". Spent the rest of the day rejecting any thoughts of you. Wow. Brain is really cooperating. Heart, not so much but will follow in time. I need some physical pain. Will ask mom to take me to get my ears pierced. Bet she'll be awfully glad to drag me to the nearest jewelery store to get my ears shot through. Hmm. Looking forward to it.

A huge ALHAMDULILLAH for the fact that I passed every thing including FYP! REJOICE!!! Woohoo! Wow.. I'm totally speechless right now. Maybe I shouldn't have dampened my mood with that but whatever! I feel like crying now. Thank you GOD!

Moving along, I've been playing Syphon Filter: Combat Ops with the bros for the past few days. Freaking frustrating considering the fact that I always always get killed. And in every way possible, I might add. The PSP is in serious danger of getting smashed. Haha! I'm such a violent person. Oh and I'm hooked on Facebook's Rock Legends! I'm a level 13 drummer. Recruit me if you can afford me. Wahaha!

Tomorrow the family is going to play badminton for 2 hours! Booked a court at the Community Center just now. Can't wait, can't wait. Maybe the body will ache after that workout. I am in serious need of exercise. Its been awhile since I last played badminton. I think the last time I played was with Sly last year. Hmm. Anybody up for a badminton match? Come look for me. HAHAHA!

Till then, happy holidays people! Take care! See ya'll soon. I'll leave you with a song I'm currently liking.

Kanye West
Heartless

[Chorus (Acapella)]
In the night, I hear them talk the coldest story ever told
Somewhere far along this road, he lost his soul
To a woman so heartless [echoes 3X]
How could you be so heartless [echoes 3X]
Oh, how could you be so heartless?

[Verse 1]
How could you be so cold as the winter wind when it breeze yo
Just remember that you talking to me yo
You need to watch the way you talking to me yo
I mean after all the things that we been through
I mean after all the things we got into
Ayo, I know there are some things that you aint told me
Ayo, I did some things but that's the old me
And now you wanna get me back and you gon show me
So you walk around like you don't know me
You got a new friend, well I got homies
But in the end it's still so lonely

[Chorus]

[Verse 2]
How could you be so Dr. Evil?
You bringing out a side of me that I don't know
I decided we weren't gon speak so
Why we up 3 A.M. on the phone?
Why though she be so mad at me for?
Homie I don't know she's hot and cold
I won't stop wont mess my groove up
Cause I already know how this thing go
You run and tell your friends that you're leaving me
They say that they don't see what you see in me
You wait a couple months then you gon see
You'll never find nobody better than me

[Chorus]

[Verse 3]
Talking talking talking talk
Baby lets just knock it off
They don't know what we been through
They don't know about me and you
So why I got something new to see?
And you just gon be keep hating me
And we just gon be enemies
I know you can't believe
I could just leave it wrong
And you can't make it right
I'm gon take off tonight (Into the night)

[Chorus]

[better in time]

This entry was written on 14th March. I was too tired to post it after writing it down. It has been a really draining week for me. Haven't had enough sleep and appetite's not too good right now.

Yesterday, I wrote an entry. Its aim was to explain things. All the while keeping in mind that it might not get through. I never like ending anything on a bad note even if I hated that person/thing. Especially if I know that I'm the one at fault. The guilt would just eat at me little by little. I wrote that entry because... I don't know what else to do. The night before, I planned what I was going to type.

I thank God for listening to my prayers. For moving you to read my blog. I would also like to thank you for having the urge to come and read my blog again. To want to understand the situation better and not just leave it as it was. At least some things got cleared out between us. And I am thankful for that.

I would like to add that... I hope that you would have the strength to get out of whatever you're in right now. Be strong ok? You'll get through this. We'll get through all these. I know this is abit late la. I always forget to say things. sheesh. Btw, you said you haven't got 12 pages of reply and you're right. Actually, you sent a 17 page sms. HAHAHAHA!

I think today was a better day. I'm still missing you and I'm still on a look-out for a red Toyota Vios Sports G with your plate number when I'm on the road. But I'll be fine. I hope everything gets better soon, for both of us. Take care.

Mariah Carey
Through The Rain

When you get caught in the rain
with no where to run
When you're distraught and in pain
without anyone
When you keep crying out to be saved
But nobody comes and you feel so far away
That you just can't find your way home
You can get there alone
It's okay, what you say is
I can make it through the rain
I can stand up once again on my own
And I know that I'm strong enough to mend
And every time I feel afraid
I hold tighter to my faith
And I live one more day
and I make it through the rain
And if you keep falling down
don't you dare give in
You will arise safe and sound,
so keep pressing on steadfastly
And you'll find what you need to prevail
What you say is
And when the rain blows,
as shadows grow close
don't be afraid
There's nothing you can't face
And should they tell you
you'll never pull through
Don't hesitate, stand tall and say
I can make it through the rain
And stand up once again
And I live one more day
And I can make it through the rain
(Yes you can)
You will make it through the rain

[i'm sorry, goodbye]

A few nights ago, I wrote a 12-page essay on my feelings about.. you. That was before. I think it kinda helped. You know, the letting out your thoughts and feelings thing instead of keeping it all in? Its almost like the book "The Giver" by Lois Lowry. Its about a weird ass place where everything will be decided for you. Even what job you get when you grow up. There's this one guy who is called the "Keeper of Memories". Basically his job is to keep the suffering, happiness and all that is human, from the people of this town. Anyways, this boy who just came of age and had to be given a job, got selected to become the next keeper of memories. So now the guy is "The Giver" while the boy is "The Receiver". They are regarded with respect in that town. Everyday, the boy will go to "The Receiver" and "receive memories from him. But everytime "The Giver" gives the boy a memory, he'll lose it forever. Thats whats happening to me now. Its like when I wrote down all those memories, I no longer feel the full effect of them. Lets just say everytime I thought about them before, I'll stop whatever I'm doing and tears start welling up. So I guess it kinda helps. Especially after what happened.

Anyways, if you're still reading this, I want you to know that its not you. Its me. It has always been me. I have enabled the archives so that you can read whatever posts I've typed about you previously. Maybe then you'll understand why this had to happen. Don't worry. You'll never have to worry about getting into trouble with your gf because of me ever again. To make it easier for you, I will list the entries for you to read including their exact month, date and day. Of course I'll never know if you are still reading this.

List of entries to take note:
14 April 06, Friday
24 May 06, Wednesday
12 November 06, Sunday
17 August 07, Friday
21 March 08, Friday
30 April 08, Wednesday
16 July 08, Wednesday
24 January 09, Saturday


Moving along, I can't believe I could once again relate to this song. Haha.

Westlife
Can't Lose What You Never Had

Baby you're so beautiful
And when i'm near you i can't breathe
A girl like you gets what she wants
When she wants it
You're so out of my league
I show you no emotion
Don't let you see what you're doin' to me
I Imagine the two of us together
But I've been livin' in reality

Fear of rejection, kept my love inside
But time is running
So damn my foolish pride!

I don't care if you think i'm crazy
It doesn't matter if it turns out bad
I've got no fear of losin' you
You can't lose what you never had

Now i'm gonna confess that i love you
I've been keepin' it inside feelin' i could die
Now if you turn away baby that's O.K.
At least we'll have a moment
Before you say goodbye

(you cant lose what you never had)

Rules are made for breakin'
Nothing' ventured nothin' gained
I'll be no worse off than i am right now
And i might never get that chance again

Fear of rejection, kept my love inside
Told my heart I didn't want you but i lied

I don't care if you think i'm crazy
It doesn't matter if it turns out bad
I've got no fear of losin' you
You can't lose what you never had

Now i'm gonna confess that i love you
I've been keepin' it inside feelin' i could die
Now if you turn away baby that's O.K.
At least we'll have a moment
Before you say goodbye

Here on the outside lookin' in
Don't wanna stay dreamin'
bout what could have been
I need to hear you speak my name
Even if you shoot me down in flames

I don't care if you think i'm crazy
It doesn't matter if it turns out bad
I've got no fear of losin' you
You can't lose what you never had

..I'm gonna confess that i love you
I've been keepin' it inside feelin' i could die
Now if you turn away baby that's O.K.
At least we'll have a moment
Before you say goodbye

(you can't lose what you never had..3x)

Again, I have to give credit where it is due. So, a huge thank you to Eileen(bitch!), Laila(sandwich face), and Sly for the listening ears. It has lessened my burden and made it a little easier for me.



I thought I was doing okay yesterday. But by night time I was beginning to feel the pinch. Maybe this isn't going to be as easy as I thought.

i love you. I'm sorry, goodbye.

[wow]

Below is an article found from iluvislam.com. Written by a lady.

Title: Kisah Saya Dan Awak
Author: eVe


Sedar tidak sedar, sudah 3 tahun saya mengenali awak. Tak pernah saya terfikir peristiwa memalukan saya terjatuh ke dalam longkang membuat hati kita bertaut. Terima kasih kepada Allah kerana mentakdirkan saya terjatuh dan terima kasih juga kerana Allah menggerakkan awak untuk mentertawakan saya. Jika tidak, hubungan kita tidak mungkin sampai sejauh ini. Siapa pernah menyangka peristiwa sekecil itu mampu mengikat hati dua insan. Walaupun saya dan awak masing-masing berjauhan, teknologi benar-benar mengikat kita.

Saya sedar, hari demi hari saya semakin menyenangi kehadiran awak dalam hidup saya. Saya bersyukur atas hubungan ini. Bersyukur kerana kita bukanlah seperti pasangan kekasih lain. Awak tidak pernah mengucap kata rindu, apatah lagi kata sayang. Seingat saya sepanjang 3 tahun ini, tidak sampai 5 kali kita bersua muka. Itupun tatkala awak dan keluarga datang beraya ke rumah saya. Saya juga bersyukur ibu bapa kita saling meredhai persahabatan kita. Hari demi hari, kita semakin matang. Saya semakin mengenali dunia, semakin mendalami ajaran Islam sebenar. Dulu, saya fikir hubungan kita tidak salah. Ya, memang tidak salah dari pandangan mata luar. Namun jujur jauh di sudut hati saya, saya sering merindui awak biarpun tiada siapa antara kita yang pernah melafazkannya. Pernah saya angankan awak menjadi pembimbing keluarga saya kelak. MasyaAllah, begitu jauh saya lalai. Kata-kata seorang teman suatu waktu dulu benar-benar mendorong saya berfikir panjang. “Zina hati sememangnya kelihatan kecil, namun dosanya tetap sama”.

Astaghfirullah…saya beristighfar panjang. Dengan segala kekuatan yang ada, saya katakan kepada awak. “Jangan hubungi saya lagi melainkan awak bersedia mengahwini saya”. Saya sendiri tidak pasti dengan apa yang saya lakukan. Saya sedar awak pasti kebingungan dengan kata-kata saya kerana antara kita sememangnya tiada yang istimewa. Saya juga sedar hakikatnya, awak juga punya perasaan terhadap saya biarpun awak mebisu seribu bahasa. Hubungan kita terputus begitu sahaja. Enam bulan berlalu dengan amat sukar bagi saya. Setiap hari saya berdoa semoga Allah permudahkan segala yang terbaik untuk saya, semoga Allah permudahkan jika apa yang saya lakukan benar-benar keranaNya. Ingin saya katakan, betapa sukar melupakan awak. Dalam kesibukan saya melupakan awak, tiba-tiba saya dikejutkan dengan rombongan peminangan. Andai awak dapat melihat hati saya, pastinya awak tahu betapa terkejutnya saya. Ya, awak tunaikan permintaan saya. Awak datang lagi ke rumah saya, tapi kali ini dengan sebentuk cincin. Sekarang saya sudah sah menjadi permaisuri hidup awak. Sekarang saya bebas merindui awak tanpa rasa berdosa, saya bebas berbicara dengan awak tanpa rasa bersalah dan saya bebas menyayangi awak kerana awaklah pembimbing hidup saya. Terima kasih Allah ikatkan kita dengan tali perkahwinan biarpun pada usia muda remaja.

Terima kasih Allah menghadirkan awak sekali lagi dalam hidup saya.

[a prayer]

Ya Allah, ampunilah dosa-dosa kedua ibubapa dan adik-beradik ku.
Ya Allah, ampunilah dosa-dosaku.
Ya Allah, ampunilah dosa-dosa teman-temanku.
Ya Allah, ampunilah dosa-dosa seluruh umat Islam.
Ya Allah, berikanlah kami kebaikan dunia dan akhirat.

Magic Numbers- I See You, You See me

Magic Numbers- I See You, You See me
I never wanted to love you, but that's ok
I always knew that you'd leave me anyway
But darling when I see you, I see me

I asked the boys if they'd let me go out and play
They always said that you'd hurt me anyway
But darling when I see you, I see me

* Its alright I never thought I'd fall in love again
Its alright I look to you as my only friend
Its alright I never thought that I could feel this something
Rising, rising in my veins
Looks like it's happened again

I never thought that you wanted for me to stay
So I left you with the girls that came your way
But darling when I see you, I see me
I often thought that you'd be better off left alone
Why throw a circle round a man with broken bones
But darling when I see you, I see me

[Repeat *]

You always looked like you had something else on your mind
But when I try to tell you, you'd tell me never mind
But darling when I see you, you see me

I wanna tell you that I'll never love anyone else
You wanna tell me that you're better off by yourself
But darling when I see you, you see me

This is not what I'm like [x4]
This is not what I do
This is not what I'm like
I think I'm falling for you

I never thought - This is not what I'm like
I never thought - This is not what I do
I never thought - This is not what I'm like
I never thought - I think I'm falling for you
I never thought -
I never thought -
That I could feel this something
Rising, rising in my veins
Looks like it's happened again

And it looks like
I feel this something
Rising, rising in my veins
Looks like it's happened again

Kopped from Farhan's blog obviously. I think it has potential to be a good song.

[Michael Jackson Rules!]

I think it is finally time for this. God knows i never thought I'd relate to this song. hmm. I think its too bad we can't lock certain entries on blogspot. Hah. After watching American Idol tonight, I think I just fell in love with Michael Jackson again. Ok, just his songs. Haha. Anyways, some of the contestants butchered his songs!

Michael Jackson
She's Out Of My Life

She's out of my life
She's out of my life
And I don't know whether to laugh or cry
I don't know whether to live or die
And it cuts like a knife
She's out of my life

It's out of my hands
It's out of my hands
To think for two years she was here
And I took her for granted I was so cavalier
Now the way that it stands
She's out of my hands

So I've learned that love's not possession
And I've learned that love won't wait
Now I've learned that love needs expression
But I learned too late

She's out of my life
She's out of my life
Damned indecision and cursed pride
Kept my love for her locked deep inside
And it cuts like a knife
She's out of my life

Thanks to Zarifah for the striking lesson. Haha!

[poem]

People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered. Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies. Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you. Be honest and sincere anyway.

What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight. Create anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous. Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, will often be forgotten. Do good anyway.

Give the best you have, and it will never be enough. Give your best anyway.

In the final analysis, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.

-this version is credited to Mother Teresa

by Dr. Kent M. Keith

1. People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered.
   Love them anyway.
   
2. If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.
   Do good anyway.
   
3. If you are successful, you win false friends and true enemies.
   Succeed anyway.
   
4. The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow.
   Do good anyway.
   
5. Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable.
   Be honest and frank anyway.
   
6. The biggest men and women with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men and women with the smallest minds.
   Think big anyway.
   
7. People favor underdogs but follow only top dogs.
   Fight for a few underdogs anyway.
   
8. What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.
   Build anyway.
   
9. People really need help but may attack you if you do help them.
   Help people anyway.
   
10. Give the world the best you have and you'll get kicked in the teeth.
    Give the world the best you have anyway.

[don't know why]

I DON'T KNOW WHY I EVEN BOTHER! WHY I EVEN GIVE A SHIT. I don't know why I put myself in so much misery. Why did I even think that the reward will be worth the pain. Why I never considered the fact that the pain would be so unbearable without the reward. Time and again this has happened to me. Why can't I get it into my thick skull?! This is unfair to me, unjust, its stupid!
I get it now. Oh, So you're allowed to not reply when somebody sms-es. But when you sms we are obliged to reply?! Is that it? Don't you know how stupid that is?! Maybe ko lupa bahawa aku juga manusia. Yang punya mata, telinga, hati dan perasaan.
This is just so fucked up la. I don't deserve this pain. You don't deserve my pain. This is one of the reasons why I regret ever knowing you. It would have saved me ALOT of pain and misery. I'm done with this.

ARGH, I NEED A VACATION. Too bad I'm not getting one.

[MJ is back!]

source: msn.com

"I love you so much. This will be it. When I say this is it, it really means this is it. I'll be performing the songs my fans want to hear. This is the final curtain call."

-- Michael Jackson announces a new series of concerts in London

You guys saw the news the other day! MICHAEL JACKSON THE KING OF POP IS FINALLY BACK. Woohoo! But tentatively we only know that he's going to perform at London. No news of whether other venues at other countries will be announced. Damn. I hope x100 he'll come to Singapore! I'm so going to his concert if and when he comes. I can't wait! Heeeeeeeee.

So as you can see from the pictures, I did go back to the Stadium Waterfront! HAHAHA! I just can't seem to get enough of the place! Its beautiful when there are big grey clouds looming above. Oh and the breeze.. Mann.. It was amazing. Some of the pictures look epic, I know. The new phone has a 3.2 megapixel camera. Haha! I was having loads of fun snapping pictures while running about. Gorgeous, gorgeous view. Plus, I'm getting to know the way to the Indoor Stadium so if there's a concert I want to go to.. Well.. Lets just say its going to be a lot easier for me.

Moving on, we went to Fresh Bulgoggi (again!) yesterday. Of course you know, I love that place. The food is delicious. And I like the concept of cooking, or rather, frying my own meat. LOL. Fulfilling experience. Anyways, that is a picture of a "Bap". Which is basically rice, topped with tauge (beansprouts?) and kangkong- I think! (don't know the translation! sorry!), pieces of CHICKEN, egg and kimchi! Doesn't that just sound divine!? HAHA! It tastes brilliant of course. Go try it sometime. We ate till our stomachs were protruding. And it costs less than $100! Good right!? Haha! Told ya!

[stadium waterfront]

Final exams are over. Its time to finally relax. NOT! FYP is still not settled yet. Went to school early this morning to send the pictures and LEDs to Mr Fazil. Thats progress i guess. Still don't know whats going to happen after this. Hope to get this over and done with as soon as possible so that i can finally unwind.

And so after weeks of deliberating on whether to go to Stadium Waterfront or not.. I finally went. With a little help from a device of course. I would have surely lost my way otherwise. Anyways since it was raining cats and dogs, didn't manage to do much. Just sat inside and looked out the windows. The air was freaking fresh lor. Was tempted to just get myself drenched in the rain. But common sense won out so i stayed inside obediently. I was ready for the situation though. Brought along the psp (which i didn't play with) and some snacks plus a bottle of water. It was okay i guess. Got to try out the camera of the new handphone. It wasn't disappointing. Super clear pictures. I mean, compared to the previous phone of course. Since I had to stay inside the whole time i was there, i didn't get to take any pictures of the area. Perhaps next time. I'm sure to return. When the weather improves, of course. =D

I am now laughing hysterically at the video of Edison Chen somebody took at the airport and posted on youtube. Apparently, Dad is in it. HAHA! Don't know how THAT happened. It's freaking hilarious though. His face was so paiseh and the guy holding the board with the name of the guest was embarrassed as well. I mean, they weren't even waiting for Edison la! They were waiting for some other guest and got caught in the video. And now, the news of him being in the video has been spread throughout the whole hotel and everyone knows! Hilarious i tell you.

Hadi's personal message is "pardonnez mes lèvres pour elles trouvent le plaisir dans les endroits les plus étranges." Its in French. It means "forgive my lips for they find pleasure in the strangest places". I find it kind of sweet. LOL. Anyways, now i'm kind of free. There's nothing for me to do. Amira has gone to China and I feel so lonely since I've got nobody to tell random things and feelings to. Boo. She'll be gone for 2 months! For God's sake. Who am i supposed to talk to!? Geez.